Two-Bit Blog in a 3-Bit World.

Color is one of those things that differentiates the sexes. Men basically see in eight colors. Something is blue or green or red. Never when we were younger did we ever hear the word midnight used before the word red, it was a time, actually it was precisely 12:00a.m.. We as men, see things very clearly and never have issues describing things. I bring this up because I was wearing a new green sweater that I purchased. A woman I was talking to complimented me on it and commented on what a nice heather forest it was. Heather forest? Flower forest? The lady three doors down forest? No, just a suffix that women use to describe a material that has flecks of color in it with the word forest appended to the end.

When I was younger I learned the colors of the rainbow as Roy G. Biv. (Red, Orange, Yellow, Green, Blue, Indigo, Violet). These colors make up the clear light spectrum. I didn't see the girls learning another acronym like, Flortentino H. Floggendoggencollinsworth III, so I assume they too at one point only saw the original eight colors. At what age do people decided that colors should be described by items? It's always some strange, nice or exotic item. You never hear colors like transmission fluid, midnight fart or heather dung. Now when I buy clothes, the colors include Turkish Java, Shark, Midnight Rose, Grey Heather. I don't want to eat or smell my clothes, just wear them.

Yes, I know very well that this is marketing, but I think that we should put in effect some form of self control when giving items color descriptions. Maybe limit the colors used to those in the original 64 Crayola Crayon boxes, you know the ones that had flesh color as some eerie orange and pink mixture. Yes, I do think that it was racially insensitive. The people who complained about this color were racially insensitive to associate it with Caucasians. Do other races actual believe that caucasian skin color looks like a Pinky ball mated with an orange peel?

Anyway ladies, as most of you know, men are very simple creatures. Please refrain from telling us about your passion fruit blouse and red sunset skirt, just tell us the pink blouse and pink skirt and we'll figure out the rest.