Tuesday Tips For Living Alone – Noise While 'not baking brownies.'

Yes, that is my laundry on the right and office chair on the left..

Most people living alone, like I, live in a multi-family dwelling. Whether it be a condo, apartment, co-op or townhouse, the builders of these homes never planned on humans actually living on these premises. If they had the walls would have been better insulated against noise.

Where am I going with this? I have an exercise machine I bought right before the divorce. It is a knock off of the one Chuck Norris and Christie Brinkley peddle on late night TV. I really like it and it seems to fit my lifestyle; it even folds up and can be pushed under a bed or leaned against a wall. Since moving into the co-op, It's sole purpose has been a place to hang the clothes I will be wearing the next day. This weekend I decided that moving it from one location to another should not be the only exercise I get from it. I put it in the center of my bedroom, fully extended it and decided that I would do reps of different exercises every time I walked by it.

Let's step back for a moment here. Remember how I said noise travels freely through the walls of my co-op to the neighbors? Well, it is a two way situation. My neighbor has a bed that has the propensity to, for lack of better definition, squeak. So once in a while when she has company over, I know they are, 'not baking brownies', if you know what I mean.

So yesterday, every time I walked by the exercise machine I decided to do ten to fifteen reps of one of the various exercises. Around lunch time I decided on doing a little bit more of a workout. After about twenty five minutes of huffing, puffing, grunting and sweating, I went out to my yard feeling pumped and ready to do some yard work.
My next door neighbor was out and the conversation went something like this.
Her : “You have somebody over?”
Me (still puffing) : “No, just taking a lunchtime break.”
Her : “Oh, thought I heard something.”
Me : “Just me upstairs in my room.”
Her : “Oh.... OK, cause it sounded like you had somebody over there.”
Me : “Nope, all alone. I have to pull some weeds from the beds now.”

After pulling some weeds from my two small beds out back, I went in and decided to do a few more reps. I get lulled into the gentle piston-like noise of the exercise machine, “Whirrr...Whump, WHIrrr... WHUmp, WHIRRR... WHUMMP.”, I let out an, “UHHHNNN”, as I butterfly one too many times. It hits me. The utter and sheer feeling of embarrassment that is burning more than the muscles in my shoulders. My neighbor thinks, I was alone, uh, 'not baking brownies.'.

I take a shower and look out the window. My neighbor's car is gone, she has already gone back to work. Ah, just as well. I'm pretty shameless and very rarely get embarrassed, so now, I begin to laugh. I wonder what the neighbor is going to think when she is home and hears the exercise machine go off ten to fifteen times a day.

I digress.

The tips for today. If you are in a multi-family dwelling with noise enhancing walls:
1. Learn to ignore things. There are plenty of professional ways to damper noise, but most are rather costly and aren't as effective as needed.
2. Communicate with your neighbors. The other of my two neighbors goes to bed early and has to be up for work by 4:00a.m.. Since she told me, I've learned to curb my noise level in certain rooms of my co-op later at night.
3. If you are, 'not baking brownies.', God bless, put the TV on a little louder or play some music. If you hear someone, 'not baking brownies.'. Put your TV on or play some music and give them some privacy. A little noise control goes a long way.